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g7vja Free Member Posts : 78 Location : Hartland 24-7 bbs Status : Offline 
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Humor LEARN CHINESE IN 5 MINUTESSay the words out loud. 1) That's not right..........................Sum Ting Wong 2) Are you harboring a fugitive? ........Hu Yu Hai Ding 3) See me ASAP............................Kum Hia Nao 4) Stupid Man.............................. Dum Fuk 5) Small Horse..............................Tai Ni Po Ni 6) Did you go to the Beach?..............Wai Yu So Tan 7) I bumped into a coffee table..........Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni  I think you need a face lift............Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here...................WaoSo Dim 10) I thought you were on a diet........Wai Yu Mun Ching 11) This is a tow away zone.............,No Pah King 12) Our meeting is next week............Wai Yu Kum Nao 13) Staying out of sight...................Lei Ying Lo 14) He's cleaning his automobile.........Wa Shing Ka 15) Your body odor is offensive.........Yu Stin Ki Pu 16) Great...................................Fa Kin Su Pah ------------------------------- An Australian, an Irishman and a Scouser are in a bar. They're staring at another man sitting on his own at a table in the corner. He's so familiar, and not recognising him is driving them mad. They stare and stare, until suddenly the Irishman twigs: 'My God, it's Jesus!' Sure enough, it is Jesus, nursing a pint.. Thrilled, they send him over a pint of Guinness, a pint of Fosters and a pint of bitter. Jesus accepts the drinks, smiles over at the three men, and drinks the pints slowly, one after another. After he's finished the drinks, Jesus approaches the trio. He reaches for the hand of the Irishman and shakes it, thanking him for the Guinness. When he lets go, the Irishman gives a cry of amazement: 'My God! The arthritis I've had for 30 years is gone. It's a miracle!' Jesus then shakes the Aussie's hand, thanking him for the lager. As he lets go, the man's eyes widen in shock. 'Strewth mate, the bad back I've had all my life is completely gone! It's A Miracle.' Jesus then approaches the Scouser who says, 'Back off, mate, I'm on disability benefit. ---------------------------- Police cordoned off Liverpool City Centre this morning when a suspicious object was discovered in a car. It later turned out to be a tax disc ------------------------------ WORLD'S EASIEST QUIZ (Passing requires 4 correct answers) 1) How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 2) Which country makes Panama hats? 3) From which animal do we get cat gut? 4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? 5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? 6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? 7) What was King George VI's first name? What color is a purple finch?
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? 10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane? Remember, you need 4 correct answers to pass. Check your answers below. ANSWERS TO THE QUIZ 1) How long did the Hundred Years War last? 116 years 2) Which country makes Panama hats? Ecuador 3) From which animal do we get cat gut? Sheep and Horses 4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? November 5) What is a camel's hair brush made of? Squirrel fur 6) The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal? Dogs 7) What was King George VI's first name? Albert What color is a purple finch? Crimson
9) Where are Chinese gooseberries from? New Zealand 10) What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane? Orange ---------------------- |
 Tue 16 Feb 2010 @ 14:21
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m3tmh Paid up Member Posts : 304 Location : 10-20. Status : Offline 
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that learn Chinese one is great... the tax disk is so true as well... as for the disability benefit! |
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Wed 17 Feb 2010 @ 03:19
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Colin Birch Admin Posts : 394 Location : Pontypridd, S.Wales Status : Offline 
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I've got an African friend name Steve and I popped around to see him today, when I got there I saw spray paint across the front of his house "NIGG3RS OUT!" I thought that's a bit extreme, he could've just left a note! Renualt and Ford are working on a new small car for women. They are mixing the Renualt Clio and the Ford Taurus and are calling it the "Clitaurus". It comes in pink and the average male car thief wont be able to find it, let alone turn it on. Rumour has it, it will leak fluid once a month and will be an arse to start in the morning... Granny and Grandad sitting at the breakfast table. Granny says "do you know, my nipples are as hot for you today as they were 50 years ago" Grandad says, "thats cause your left ones in your coffee and your right ones in your porridge" ---------------------- |
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Sun 28 Feb 2010 @ 20:25
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